What’s cool? Well, a battle report is pretty cool sometimes. Here’s one where The Blood Skulls Chaos Space Marines take on the Khardasian Palace Guard as the Chaos Marines try to get a foothold on the planet Uluru. We used the Webs of Uluru: A 40k 2nd edition Campaign Booklet for this game. If you don’t know what it is, you’re not special.

Battlereport – Armageddon it!

Planet Uluru has changed hands more times than anyone cares to remember. Located in the Rovedian sector at the outer edge of the Eastern Fringe, the Imperium’s grip here is light at best. The planet is a prized possession due to its vast fields of astroturf, the substance that has become the core of countless conflicts in the region. Now the time has come again. The current rulers of Uluru are unaware, but a usurper is ready to make his move from the shadows. Uluru possesses no planet-wide defence grid and no meaningful orbital presence. The usurper therefore plans to land near the southern turf basin, where defensive forces are scattered and response times are slow. Unfortunately, this region also hosts one of the largest remaining populations of Gigarachnids. Overlooking the basin stand two elevated ridgelines, both ideal for establishing a forward base. From a distance, the advance forces of the Incumbent have observed the landings. They choose to strike immediately. Whoever holds the high ground will dictate the pace of the campaign.

Game size: 1500 points

Mission: In addition to standard Victory Points for destroying enemy units, each hill is worth 5 Victory Points. To control a hill at the end of the game count the numbers of models on that hill: Models with 25 mm bases count as 1, while models with

>25 mm bases count as 2. The side with more models within 1” of the hill controls it.

Deployment: Both sides deploy up to 12″ from opposite long table edges and at least 12″ from the side edges.

Game Length: 4 turns.

Special Rules: Monstrous Encounters, Prophetic Overconfidence and The Turfshine Effect from the special rules section are in play. Since it is in the open, and close to the Gigarachnid Expanse, Monstrous Encounters can be on 5+ should the players wish so.

Introduction

The Tallarn 42nd Regiment, The Screaming Camels, are out in great numbers on Uluru, for the campaign “Webs of Uluru”. The force I will be using mostly for the campaign is the 3rd. Company of my regiment, namely the Khardasian Palace Guard, or KPG for short. As with many Imperial regiments, the main body of the KPG is infantry. In this case three platoons of 55 guardsmen each, will make quite an impression on any battlefield they enter. The three platoons will of course be supported by both armor and special units from the 42nd. Regiment as Rough Riders, Ogryns and Ratlings all are deployed to Uluru. 

Blood Skulls Battle plan

Currently, Uluru is a planet where hesitation gets you buried under sand, spiders or Guardsmen. The plan is therefore simple: hit fast, take ground early, and force the Guard to react.

The objectives are everything in this scenario. Two hills, 5 points each. So essentially you can win by that alone. So the opening move is aggressive: push hard onto both hills as early as possible and make the Guard fight uphill through bodies.

The Traitor Guard will do what they were born to do, die in the right place. They will move first, take space, and screen the Marines from incoming fire. If the Guard wants to shoot something, they should be shooting them, not power armor.

The Blood Skulls Marines will focus on securing and holding the objectives. Once in position, they will force the Imperial Guard into the worst possible situation: advancing into rapid fire range while trying to outnumber something that does not care about morale. I feel confident that once my Plague Marines are on that right hill, blasting rapid fire everywhere, no one is going to remove them. 

I guess the rhino, is 50 pts worth of mobile coverage… so I am going to storm that to the left hill and use it for annoying afterwards. 

The predator I don’t know. I guess it should go tank hunting. But actually it is not very good at it. 

Speaking of tank hunting – my Chaos Lord, Jhunkhed, will hunt. Ideally the Leman Russ. Realistically, whatever he can actually catch. If he makes it into combat, things will get interesting. If not, he will at least look menacing while jogging across the battlefield.

Z’hool, The Sorcerer, brings the wildcard. If the Warp behaves, things could escalate quickly with summoned horrors and general chaos. If not, well, at least he tried.

Overall plan: take both objectives early, absorb the shooting, and trust that power armor, positioning, and just enough Chaos nonsense will carry the day.

Screaming Camels Battle plan

My arch nemesis the traitorous Blood Skulls Chaos Marines, have made their presence known on Uluru. It is now up to the Screaming Camels to ensure that they don’t get a foothold on the planet, so we can maintain our control of the turf. First thing we must do in order for this to be a success, is to take and hold some of the hills surrounding the basin in order to establish our dominance over the terrain and hopefully give us an advantage in the coming conflict. 

History has shown me that whenever you’re fighting Chaos Marines, you need some serious firepower, especially if they bring the dreaded Terminators. And I did bring some power to the fight but also took a slightly different approach. I chose to go with a full platoon of 60 Guardsmen supported by a single Heavy Weapons Squad, 5 Ratlings and a Leman Russ Battle Tank. 

The plan is to compensate for what I lack in power with sheer numbers. My Guardsmen will outnumber the Blood Skulls, no doubt about that. Hopefully this will give me enough leverage to obtain and hold at least one if not both objectives. As long as I can keep the infantry out of any assault, I should have enough troops to make it difficult for Dr. the Viking to keep me off both objectives. To give me just a bit of mobility I mounted the Colonel and his squad in a Chimera. I like to give him some sort of protection and a chance to make it behind enemy lines, but also history has shown that the Multilaser in the turret (with its three Sustained Fire Dice) can make quite an impact even on Chaos Marines. 

The Ratlings will be used for what they are, a little surprise for a small amount of points. I rarely get any real good use out of them (in my experience this is often a result of terrain on the board, or lack thereof), but they’re not expensive and really only need one good shooting phase to make up for their points. And with plenty of expensive targets in the enemy army, they should get a chance to do just that. I had points to spend, and went with a few extra heavy weapons. Hopefully keeping them behind the main guardsmen will let them stay away from enemy fire long enough to do some damage, should any targets turn up.  The power I did bring comes in the form of the good old reliable Leman Russ Battle Tank. Capable of dealing with both armor and troops, this lovely little tank has always been one of my favorites.  

As with any fight with my dear friend Dr. The Viking, I know he always brings a surprise or two, so I doubt that my plan will be effective. I’ve seen many plans unravel due to lack of leadership in the Imperial Guard, so my guess is that the Blood Skulls will come out of this game victorious. 

Before combat: Blood Skulls win strategy roll, and elects to start.  Instead of the standard deployment we chose to deploy one unit at a time. 

Blood Skulls Deployment

Speed and early board control were the priorities, so the Rhino with Squad Haemophiliaks was placed aggressively toward the left side, angled directly at the nearest hill.Both Traitor Guard squads were positioned centrally, ready to advance and spread out as a living screen. Their job was not to survive, but to occupy space, soak fire, and make sure the Marines behind them arrived intact.The Nurgle Marines deployed just behind the screen, slightly right of center, with a clear route toward the second hill. Snaggletooth, the Icon Bearer, took up a central position where his banner could influence as much of the line as possible. Whether anyone would actually stay in range of it was, as always, optimistic at best.The Predator was placed forward with a clear line toward the Guard heavy weapons and the Leman Russ. Jhunkhed deployed on the flank with the most terrain, clearly eyeing the Leman Russ as his prize. A long walk, but Chaos Lords are nothing if not committed to questionable life choices. Z’hool the Sorcerer joined the Blood Skulls Marines in the Rhino. Overall, the deployment reflected the plan: push fast, take ground early, and dare the Guard to try and take it back.

Screaming Camels Deployment

I’m going to spread out the battleline, to cover most of the board. They won’t be used as cover for much other than each other and the single Heavy Weapons squad, so I’d rather that they potentially can move on both objectives and still provide the Blood Skulls with more targets than they can get off the board. Ratlings start the game hiding in a turffield, not the optimal position, but at least they will most likely survive for more than 1 turn. 

The Colonel in the Chimera, ready to move on the left flank and the Battle Tank on the right. Plenty of possible targets for both, so they should come in handy. I’m keeping the Heavy Weapons behind the line of Guardsmen, in the center of the field. If I’m lucky I won’t have to move them, giving them several turns to do their anti tank “magic”. 

Prophetic Overconfidence: We each jotted down who we thought would win and hid it for the aftergame sequence.

TURN 1

Butorg fields: Ratlings suffered mild turfshine delirium, 2 Ratlings were affected.

Monstrous Effect: no effect

Blood Skulls – Turn 1

The Bloods were really eager to get going! In fact, almost a little too eager. Every single unit ended up running in one way or another: First, the Blood Skulls of Squad Haemophiliaks raced in their Rhino towards Hill 1. The rhino was supercharged which gave them an extra 3”. Unfortunately it meant they all had to take a S2 hit as they dived out of the vehicle as it made a handbrake turn on the hill. Fortunately nothing happened to anyone. The hill was secured, the game was as good as won.

Meanwhile, the Traitor Guard and the icon bearer ran up the middle and right flanks. The idea was that the Traitor Guard should be closest to the enemy at all times to force them to shoot at the worthless mortals instead of risking the power armoured super heroes. The Blood Skulls squad seemed to have completely forgotten that plan in their rhino haste. The Nurgle Marines, who were much more controlled in their enthusiasm, followed the plan and advanced behind the guardsmen. Snaggletooth, the Icon Bearer, knowing there was nothing like a nice-looking banner to keep folks going, advanced so both guardsmen squads were within range of his banner for re-rolls. My Chaos Predator was acting like it was possessed! (it wasn’t) It sped up to 20” combat speed and rolled straight into front of the Imperial Guard lascannon heavy weapons squad. I think the idea was that the predator was going to race behind the Leman Russ and kill it dead. Lastly, Lord Jhunkhed decided that his finest hour would also come against the Leman Russ lurking on the left flank, and he chose to run towards it while exploiting cover. Coordination, as always, was not a part of the Chaos toolbox. Z’hool the wizard had a pretty boring Psychic phase as snake eyes were rolled for the power of the Warp energy. Booh!

Screaming Camels – Turn 1

Ok, so far so good, nothing scary or dangerously surprising happened in the first Blood Skull turn. And even though a few of the Ratlings apparently had been smoking a bit of that leaf, the first turn should go without any issues… right?

We kept most of our troops in position. It looked like the Dr. had already appointed us several targets, so no need to go searching for more than necessary. I moved two squads closer to one of the objectives, still staying somewhat in cover and out of sight. Lieutenant Molesby and his Command Squad, accompanied by Commissar Barl Morough followed, keeping a close eye on the troops (really?… first turn and you’ve already forgotten why you deployed them in the middle of the battleline. Who was going to keep the other three squads in line, when you had pushed all three leaders to one end of the board?… you twat!)

Enough of that bickering with yourself. Let’s get to the important bit… shooting! A lot of targets should have provided for some casualties. “pew pew kapow flapaff”… what? You’ve never heard two Lascannon making nothing but scratches on a tank? Luckily their Missile Launcher buddy had a better eye, and he managed to poke a hole in the Predator and kill two crew members… small success. Next target, the Chaos Marines that came pouring out of the Rhino, they were going to feel the full force of two squads and a Leman Russ Battle Tank… or maybe just the heat from the lasguns shooting stars while the tank apparently felt like jamming was a good thing. Meanwhile mortars went off either in the air or in totally wrong directions, but at least the few Ratlings who weren’t too high to point their guns at the enemy knew how to use them, putting the total kills for one entire phase up to… three? (not counting the crew members).

Blood Skulls – Turn 2

Oh my GOAT HORNS! The Imperial Guard turn had taken about four times as long as the Mighty Chaos turn. What a shambles! The IG were trying to out-patience us! Despite their best attempts at mortar sniping and laser cannoning, nothing really happened.

Anyway, turn two was another quick affair, where both traitor squads ran and left their heavy bolters behind. The Traitor Guards on the left flank reached the hill and formed a screen around the Blood Skulls Marines. Snaggletooth, the Icon Bearer, looked a bit confused at the two traitor guard squads who were now going far from him in opposite directions. “To hell with it,” he thought, and stayed in the middle.

The other guard squad also reached a hill and stood firm, Chaos now hugging both objectives. The Rhino turned into a mobile piece of wall after having delivered its cargo. The vehicle spun around, supercharged and fired its twin-linked bolters. Good times!

Jhunkhed used the cover of the Rhino to sneak even closer to the prized target that the Leman Russ presented. Big game hunting was a sport for real Lords of Chaos.

Plague Squad Xyphilis advanced towards the ruins closer to the right flank hill, primed and ready to go rapid firing from there on. The Predator had taken quite a beating, losing two crew members, and now only had a single sponson to fire at the Leman Russ. Obviously this was not enough to penetrate anything!

The right-hand Traitor Guard squad unleashed its lasguns on an Imperial Guard squad opposite them. “Pew pew pew,” it said! Mainly because this was the sound they had been instructed to make whenever their rifles didn’t actually fire, since they were old, rusty, and poorly maintained. The two heavy bolter teams did a bit more serious damage and took out three guardsmen and a single Ratling with mild delirium.

Screaming Camels – turn 2

I kinda felt like I had gotten lucky in the first chaos turn, even though I knew they often elected to go charging across the board instead of shooting from the get go. But this second time around, I knew I had gotten lucky. Yes there were casualties, but so far the plan was holding up. It was time to consolidate the guardsmen a bit. I was going to leave the heavy weapons where they were, they wouldn’t be doing any good if I had to move the troops again (which I was guessing would happen, as they hadn’t made it to the objectives yet). I tried to get into a position where I could reach the hills, but stay out of assault range. A bit tricky but so far it was working.

Where I had hit close to nothing in the first turn, I hoped for better results this time around. I needed to concentrate fire on fewer units, which should have given better results. We were off to a bad start as the mortars still weren’t dialed in on the enemy positions. Focusing on holding the objective, the Ratlings started shooting at the Traitor Guards hiding behind the hill. Supported by Sergeant Dattuck and his men along with the Chimera, they managed to break their spirits and kill the entire squad as well as the Heavy Bolter team that were lurking in the shadows.

“boooo zap pew pew kapow”… Heavy Weapons and lasguns alike fired towards the Plague Marines to absolutely no effect… curses. It seemed like it was the Guardsmen who were failing at the moment, as was also shown when neither Rhino nor Chaos psycho… sorry psyker, took anything but a scratch though multiple lasguns and meltas were pointing in their direction. The Leman Russ crew however found their target with the Battlecannon sending bits and pieces of both Traitor Guards and marines into the air.

Blood Skulls – turn 3

Another really long Guard turn. I couldn’t believe you had to go through all that trouble just to end up exactly where you started. I did lose a Traitor Guard squad, but let’s be honest – that’s what they’re there for. I thought now was the time to get my secret weapon out of its box. Oh yeah, my sorcerer had brought inferno bolts! Dam dam daaah! Before the game, I had seen for my inner eye how these bolts would be released and Horrors would pop up in the Imperial Guard ranks causing total mayhem! Glorious! Now it was time to deliver on this vision. Z’hool, my sorcerer, advanced on the hill and fired into the Guard infantry. A measly two kills – shambles! My dice rolling was to blame, as there were plenty of hits. The rest of the turn was business as usual: The rhino rolled around and protected the flank of the sorcerer from the Leman Russ, that would otherwise most likely melt him into the ground. Jhunkhed, the Chaos Lord, was still off chasing the Leman Russ. By now he was finally poised for a charge in turn 4. This guy did not see enough action to justify his points. After realising the futility of shooting at the Battle Tank with my badly mauled Predator, I reversed it at full speed to get to the other hill where it could at least fire at the Chimera. Obviously, this didn’t amount to much as seemingly the las cannon was firing blanks (blinks?). My infantry didn’t do much this turn, apart from my Plague Marines. They unleashed with rapid fire at the IG command squad and took out all of them! Praise be!

The psychic phase finally saw me able to cast something. But it was actually only because I had saved a power card from last turn – that might have been a Fantasy rule that accidentally snuck in. But in the end casting Pink Fire and killing two guardsmen in a squad didn’t yield any Horrors either. But at least the squad ran off. Lastly, it dawned on me that I had completely failed to get into close combat so far this game! The objectives lured me into thinking wrongly!

Screaming Camels – turn 3

HOLY IMPERIAL CRAP…Why on earth did I send the Command Squad forward, those pesky Plague Marines really did a number on me there, I hoped I had something up my sleeve to keep them from killing everybody. With that in mind, I had to get Colonel Dugnutt in position. Rolling slowly to a halt short of the hill, the HQ unit disembarked and readied for the final push for the objective. The Ratlings had done what they could from their hiding spot, so they followed the Colonel and “RUN TO THE HILLS…RUN FOR YOUR LIVES”. Seeing this sudden and brave move Sergeant Dattuck and his men quickly followed suit.

Still a bit too many enemies, too close for my liking at the other objective. We were going to try to play it somewhat safe, and hide in the turf, hoping the cover would help us survive long enough to contest the objective. First “surprise” of the game… Chaos magic (let’s just call it what it is… cheating). I think I got somewhat lucky on that one, only a few wounds and no horror surprise, that would have changed the outcome of my turn very quickly.

Meanwhile that Chaos Lord was getting awfully close to my Battle Tank, so I put it in reverse, stayed clear of his can opener and gave him a present of Heavy Bolters and a Lascannon.

The remaining guardsmen were still firing across the board. The Plague Marines had found some heavy cover in a ruin, rendering them safe from a rain of fire. Not that it really mattered as the Autocannon fixed on their position managed to do a Double Jam, keeping it out for the rest of the game. It almost felt like fate when the Predator did the bold move charging across the field, just to come into range of the Heavy Weapons Squad. And with a little bit of guidance (Strategy card “Crack Shot”), they managed to open the tank and kill the remaining crewmembers. So… last turn my Guardsmen had no luck finding the weak spot in the Psyker’s armor, but this time the Meltagun hit true and to my great satisfaction we learned that even the ancient Chaos Marine armor could do little against the heat of a close range Meltagun, as the Psyker was turned into a stinking pile of goo.

With three targeted heavy guns fixed on a single Marine, albeit a Chaos Lord, the outcome should only have been the one… and yet he still lived. The Battlecannon however found a target amidst the Blood Skull Marines, but how their armor kept them alive, I honestly don’t know (I called it before he rolled, and yes the Dr. actually rolled multiple 6’s on his save).

Round 4 – Victory points start of round: 5-5

Turfshine Effect: no effect

Monstrous Effect: no effect

Blood Skulls – turn 4

Ugh! I actually stared in disbelief as the Leman Russ rolled backwards… I admitted that I was more than a little hungover playing this game, but the thought that it could simply roll back and avoid my Chaos Lord and his meager 4” move had never even registered in my mind. I was glad that Mørk could at least laugh his ass off at my expense and profound confusion.

Uhm… so now I needed another plan: Push came to shove. I was going to go all in on the objectives this turn. If I could withstand the Guard shooting one more turn, like the last few turns, I might actually have swung this my way. The one hill with the Plague Marines would require significantly more luck than the other, but hey – it was time to kick ass and chew bubble gum. And I was all out of sugar free chewing gum. First I moved the Plague Marines onto the right hill. Then the remaining Traitor Guard squad moved onto the other hill. The Blood Skulls squad moved (well, they were nearly there already) on the left hill. Again the 50 pts Rhino rolled in front of something I didn’t want to get blown up by the Lemna Russ- the Blood Skulls and the Traitor Guard holding the objectives. Incredibly tactic! Lastly, I moved the stranded Chaos Lord closer to the IG line instead. I had a trick up my sleeve! (or so I thought). Yeah, because he was actually carrying A RAD GRENADE! So, those goddamn Guardsmen would have had to pay for every inch of advancing towards the objective. He lobbed the grenade right untop of the guards, and rolled a 3” for the radius! Fantastic! The dirty grenade killed 11!!! guardsmen on detonation and left a huge chunk of radioactive ground for the survivors to wade around in. This was the stuff!

Screaming Camels – turn 4

HOLY FETHING IMPERIAL CRAP ON A STICK… I knew three turns with only one surprise was a little too good to be true. I could only count myself lucky that the Chaos Lord saw the Battle Tank as his prize early in the game. Had he found reason to use the Rad grenade towards my guardsmen earlier, it could very well have changed the battle of the objective and the outcome completely. But besides the late radiation attack, I think my Guardsmen had been pretty lucky so far.

As it stood, there were really only two things that needed to be done. Colonel Bobson Dugnutt along with his men, the Ratlings and Dattuck’s squad would try to secure one objective. Sergeant Graffoe would push his men forward and, supported by the Heavy Weapons behind them, they would lay down fire on the Plague Marines who were going for the same objective. With Flamer and Heavy Weapons united, they finally managed to deal enough damage to the hardened Plague Marines to stop them from reaching it.

The Rad Grenade was forcing me to either give up the objective or make a push for it. And as true guardsmen we made a push for it. Even though it ended up killing another 5 guardsmen, several made it through or around and managed to make it all the way to the objective. The only thing that stood between them and victory was the enemy hiding on the other side of the hill. If only I had a weapon that could do some serious damage to several troops… oh wait! LEMAN RUSS TO THE RESCUE… or something. Gunning the engines forward, ignoring possible terrain obstacles and a confused Chaos Lord, the Battle Tank lowered its cannon, found its target and with a thundering roar sent Blood Skulls flying everywhere… HUZZAH!

The objective was ours…VICTORY… For the Emperor, Tallarn and the Screaming Camels!

End of Game

Blood Skulls End of Game

Alright, alright, alright. That didn’t go well! A resounding defeat actually. The way I make missions I always try to make the objective count for more or AS much as the VP you can get from killing stuff. I think that serves well to make sure people don’t just ignore the scenario. In this case, I would have been better off pursuing a completely different strategy. Instead of shielding my expensive marines with my chaff (the Traitor Guard) I should have hammered forward with the Marines and then gotten the Guard engaged in sweet melee. Then the chaff could have stood back and held this objectives. This way, I could probably have snagged one or both ot the objectives, and added some VP through destruction too. Also, why oh why did I send my Predator hunting for that Leman Russ? I should have teleported my Chaos Lord directly into battle with it instead. Yeah, so that is a tough learning. I was pretty beat up after having been doing some heavy lift… drinking the evening and night before this game. At least that is my excuse. I can’t wait to play the next game though. The sabotage mission. It oozes of atmosphere, and I have JUST the plan for what to bring. 

Screaming Camels End of Game

Honestly, the points really don’t do the game justice. I had some shitty rolls early in the game, but on the other hand also got lucky as the Dr. didn’t exactly shine in that regard. 

My game plan worked. I managed to stay out of close combat  and had enough troops to claim both objectives at the end. But… I got lucky. The Dr. hadn’t thought the effect of the Rad grenade through, as he could have (and probably should have) used it to keep my men from gaining the second objective. And with just a tiny amount of luck in favor of his psyker, Pink Horrors would have sprung up in the thick of the very guardsmen who ended up securing that objective. Not being able to do that, is really what lost him the game if you ask me. 

History repeats itself, with another close game between the arch enemies. And as always a fun one at that. I can’t remember when I last laughed so hard at something “stupid” the Dr. did during a game (or in this instance, said/realized). 

Kinda fun that we both had guessed the Blood Skulls to win, only to be wrong. Can’t wait for 2nd scenario of the campaign. 

The turfshine must flow

Mørk

**Victory points **

Blood Skulls: 6

Screaming Camels: 19 (10 from both objectives)

Prophetic Overconfidence: We had both pointed at The Blood Skulls Chaos Space Marines as the winner, so none of us snagged the extra 3 VP. 

Narrative:

The dust hung thick over the basin as Colonel Dugnutt surveyed the field through the cracked lenses of his auspex. The enemy had come fast, too fast, their corrupted engines screaming across the red earth with reckless intent. Chaos always mistook speed for victory.

They took the hills early. Of course they did. Traitor Guard spilled across the ridgelines like expendable chaff, and behind them the Blood Skulls advanced with grim inevitability. It looked bad. It always did, in the beginning.

“Hold,” he had ordered. And the line held.

Lasfire stitched the air, erratic at first, then steadier. The men found their rhythm. They always did. The Butorg fields shimmered at the edges of vision, the Turfshine whispering half-formed futures into tired minds. Some saw victory. Some saw death. Most saw both.

Reports came in. The Command Squad was gone. Plague Marines were advancing. A Chaos Lord was closing in. All of it noise. All of it expected.

What mattered was the ground.

When the Rad grenade hit, the line buckled. Men died screaming, the earth itself turning against them. For a moment, it looked like the hill was lost.

“Forward,” Dugnutt had said.

And they went.

Through radiation, through fire, through fear. Not because it made sense, but because that was the order. Because that was what Guardsmen did.

The Leman Russ roared past, its cannon speaking with final authority. When the smoke cleared, the traitors were gone from the ridge.

Silence followed. Not peace. Just absence of immediate violence.

Dugnutt lowered the auspex. Another foothold denied. Another enemy pushed back into the dust.

On Uluru, that was all victory ever was.

Temporary.